


Silent Pleas

by PyrePyro



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Attempted Rape/Non-Con, Female Pronouns for Pidge | Katie Holt, I wrote this before I watched season 5, M/M, Past Abuse, Protective Lotor, Sad Lance (Voltron), healthy lancelot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-29
Updated: 2018-06-13
Packaged: 2019-04-14 09:54:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 3
Words: 20,453
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14133642
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PyrePyro/pseuds/PyrePyro
Summary: Lance is in a romantic relationship with Lotor and no one is happy about it. Lance can ignore that easily, but what happens when his ex boyfriend Jake (OC) comes along wanting him back? Can he remain happy or will his unknown past destroy him?





	1. Chapter 1

Lance woke. A long yawn escaped him as he rolled over onto his side, nuzzling his head against the soft pillow. His head felt heavy, telling him he was not going to get up any time soon. He was too tired to get up and he loved sleeping in.  
He hummed in his dreamy state and cracked his eyes open. He wasn't just ready to get up, but the feeling of eyes on him continued to nag at him.  
He noticed the face that was staring at him and he frowned in early morning confusion. “Were you watching me sleep?”  
Lotor responded with a short nod. “I was observing,” he said, innocently, wearing his faultless grin.  
Lance stared at him for a long moment, before rolling onto his back. “That's creepy Lotor...” he mumbled groggily.  
“You talk in your sleep. It's rather entertaining.”  
“Yeah, what do I say?”  
“You gloat mostly.”  
Lance smiled at that. “Yeah, I know I'm awesome,” he blinked a bit, trying to get the sleep out of his eyes. Something in the corner of his vision caught his attention and he turned his head to investigate. His head rose from his pillow as he realised the annoying flashing was coming from his tablet in the corner. The little device would have normally been buzzing rapidly, yet Lance was one of the few of them to discover a mute option on the side. And for once, he regretted his decisions.

He instinctively sat up. “How long has that been flashing?!”  
He heard Lotor give an amused hum behind him. “Ah yes, it has been for some time now.”  
Lance turned to face the still smiling prince as he scolded him. “Dammit Lotor wake me up if it does!” He rolled off of the mattress. Immediately he regretted this action as he thudded loudly on the floor, his sleepy shoulder burned at the unexpected pain. He leapt up from the floor and gathered his clothes, hurriedly dressing himself and unknowingly giving Lotor a show as he chose not to move from his spot but simply watch the paladin make a fool of himself.

“Allura's gonna flip! This is the third time this month I've been late for an urgent meeting!”  
“If it is so urgent then shouldn't someone have gone looking for you?” Lotor rolled his wrist in explanation.

“I don't know. But I'm in for it.” Lance exclaimed, slipping on his jacket and making toward the door. “I'll see you out there. Maybe I can vouch for both of us. They're probably gonna think you're to blame. Which you are!”

Lotor merely shrugged.  
Lance exited the prince's bedroom and started up the corridor. If he were lucky, his tablet hadn't been going off for very long. As much as he would have loved to stay in that morning, whatever was in store for him in the bridge must be good enough to interrupt sleep.

The door to the bridge parted and allowed him through to find that the whole team were present. Even Matt was there for the occasion. Whatever this was, Lance hoped he wasn't about to get a scolding for it.  
The group all turned at his arrival and he gave an awkward grin.  
“Heh, morning guys.”

“Lance, how nice of you to join us.” Allura folded her arms, looking him over with a disapproving scowl.  
“Sorry, I was really tired!” he complained, earning a sigh.  
“Well, you're here now.” she flatly, before turning to Matt. “Now then, you were saying.”

Matt nodded in appreciation and spoke loudly, making sure everyone could hear him. “We have reason to believe that the Galra are planning something that is directed at Voltron specifically. We've noticed Galra generals gathering together for meetings of some kind. Whatever it is, we believe that they are planning on joining all their units for this one attack.”

“Are there any theories on what it could be?” Shiro asked.  
Matt was about to respond, but another voice cut him off before he had the chance.

“I can answer that.”  
All eyes met with the rebel by Matt's side as he separated himself to walk forward into view.  
Lance had barely noticed him when he'd entered. He'd been too distracted by the sleepiness in his head to focus on anything else.  
He wore the typical rebel cloak and armour. His face was concealed within a helmet. He didn't stand out too much. Yet, there appeared to be something strange about him.  
Lance wasn't sure if it were the way he walked or his build. The feeling that he were missing something prickled on the back of his neck. He seemed far too familiar. And if that voice told him anything, it wasn't new to him.

As he stood in view of all the paladins, he raised his right forearm. It was plated in purple armour, undoubtedly Galran technology. He pressed a finger on the device and audible beep sounded. A large screen projected out of it, painting the room in a pink glow.

“This is one of their communicators. I snatched this from one of them in one of my field missions. Only a few of these are operational and given to the highest authorities to keep them paged. It notifies me of any new intel on what they're working on.” he stated, pressing again to add text to the screen.  
“That's incredible,” Pidge whispered.  
“I think so too,” the rebel snickered. “There's talk of a weapon of some kind. I can't figure it out though. A lot of this is code, but if I can decode it we should be in a know soon enough.” he established, his head turning on a tilt.  
There was a long gap of silence in amongst the group as they waited for the rebel to continue.  
Lance shifted as he noticed that he was the cause for the rebel's abrupt stop. He caught him staring at him rather intently... as if sizing him up. Whatever the reason, Lance didn't like it.

“And you are?” he asked, his eyes flickering up and down the rebel.  
The rebel gave a short chuckle, shaking his head. “I would have thought it was obvious.”  
When this resulted in confused looks, he laughed again and reached for his helmet.  
He fumbled with it for a moment, before there was a click and he pulled it off of his head, exposing himself to the paladins.

Lance tensed up as he saw.... him.  
Lustrous blond hair, those brown eyes, that strong chin which broadened as he grinned that confidence that Lance had once tried to master.  
Lance's mind locked up, his heart thundered, and every part of his being screamed and pleaded for him to run.

The body made sense now. He'd once marvelled over it's broadness and strength. The lump in his throat began to rise up and he unwillingly opened his mouth as what he expected was a wail began to surface from that pit of horror.  
“Jake!” Hunk's voice shouted near him, causing his mouth to shut and his eyes to dart in his direction. His friend had a look of ebullient surprise on his face as he smiled at the blond. And if he looked further across the room he could see Keith and Pidge matching Hunk's expression.  
“No way, you're apart of the rebellion?”

“You bet,” the blond chuckled, running a hand through his hair with a laugh, trying to ruffle it up as it had been flattened by the helmet.  
“A friend of yours?” Shiro's voice said in amongst the joy.

“Oh right. Sorry.” Hunk gave a sheepish grin as they realised introductions were in order for those not familiar.  
“This is Jake. He was one of the friends we made back at the Garrison. He learned a lot faster than us and his skills were so impressive that he moved up to a higher facility. But that didn't stop him from sending letters and we occasionally got video calls.” Pidge explained. “Everyone was so jealous. He left a huge fan group behind when he went.”

“Fans? If anybody's a fan of anyone here, I'm your biggest fan. Flying around in legendary loins, saving the day, forming Voltron? You guys are the ones that need praising.”  
“No, you're a fan of us?” Hunk asked, clearly baffled by the notion.  
“How could I not be? You guys are amazing!”

“It is good to meet you Jake. It is always a pleasure to make more allies in our fight against Zarkon's forces.”  
“The pleasure is all mine princess.”

As the group was reminiscing of old times, Lance stood separated from that field of joy. He watched the blond in silence. He waited for himself to wake up and banish this man like the nightmare he surely was. However, he remained stubbornly real.

Lance's brows knit together and slowly shook his head, gulping. “What.... what are you doing here?” he asked, his voice more gravelly than intended.  
Jake's attention was brought back to Lance and he smiled kindly. “Thought you'd never ask.” he laughed, rubbing the back of his neck. “Pretty much the same story as Matt. The Galra captured me and was preping me to fight for their entertainment. Luckily before anything extreme happened I was one of few who were saved by the rebellion. I've been with them ever since.”

He sighed happily and took a step towards the brunet, his eyes never leaving him. “It's been way too long Lance.”  
Lance stood like a deer in head lights, unable to respond.  
“Oh yeah, I almost forgot about that. Didn't you guys used to date?”  
“Yeah,” Jake sighed. “We did. I really wonder what happened to us.” Then his face lit up. “Say, you aren't seeing anyone are you?”

A chorus of uncomfortable groans wafted in the room and Jake looked around at the commotion.  
“Man, I don't know how to tell you this...” Hunk murmured.

By pure coincidence, the door behind Lance opened. He saw Jake back up a bit, his eyes fixed behind him.  
Lance turned to his left just as Lotor stopped beside him. Lotor seemed to regard the blond as their eyes met, both appearing to read each other.  
Jake swallowed and straightened up. “Prince Lotor I presume. I've heard a lot about you.”  
“You are correct. Now who are you?” the prince inquired, though he appeared uninterested.

The question alone was a jab at the blond's ego and he scowled. “The name's Jake. I'm surprised Lance hasn't told you about me.” he winked at the brunet. “Anyway, like I was saying before you interrupted. Lance, I think now is the perfect time to– ”

“Wait! Jake... that was what I was about to tell you.” Hunk said, giving an awkward grin. “Lance is kind of dating Lotor now...”  
Jake's smile evaporated as he took in the words which were spoken.

In that instant, an idea pieced itself together in Lance's brain, sparking to life like a light bulb. He forced a playful grin and wrapped his arms around one of Lotor's, pressing himself close to his side. “Yep. That's us. We're a couple. What are the odds of that happening?”  
Few heads turned away from the scene, Lotor himself glanced down at Lance suspiciously.  
Jake seemed stunned. He looked between the two, searching for any signs that it were a joke. He found none and he slowly began to nod, more to himself than them. “Oh.... congratulations?” he whispered, then stepping forward added. “Can you trust him Lance? Has he ever hurt you?”

Lance inched back, causing for Lotor's arm to be tugged slightly and for the prince to lose his glare. He stole a short glance down at the brunet, before returning his gaze to Jake, a sour expression planted on him. “I have already risked my own life to ensure his safety on the battlefield, what purpose would I have to harm him myself?”

“I was asking him.” Jake spat back, not taking his eyes off of Lance's.  
Lance didn't say a word. But he shook his head in response.

“Are you sure?” he persisted.

“I can assure you there isn't any defects between us.” Lotor countered, growing impatience with the questions.  
Jake removed his eyes from Lance and glared up at the prince. “Not sure if I believe that. It is in Galra nature to lie.”  
Lance looked between the pair as they stared each other down. Everyone could see clearly they were not going to get along.

Seeing the tension between the three, Allura called out from behind.  
“Jake, please. If you don't mind, we would like to hear more of what you have learned.”  
“Huh? Oh, of course.” he beamed, turning his back on the two and approaching the princess. “I've recently discovered that they're moving few of their ships....”

Lance's mind went numb as his adrenaline subsided. He was only vaguely aware he had let go of Lotor. He was even less aware that he had backed up towards the door. His body moved on it's own as his arm reached out and pressed the door open. Keeping his gaze firm on the blond as he stepped into the hall. As the metal slab was closing, he couldn't help but notice two things.  
He saw Lotor looking back at him with a queer expression.  
Further in the room, he saw Jake activate the screen once again.

The purple lighting illuminated his face, giving him the perfect shot of his expression as their eyes met. Jake's lips curled into a sly grin, one that made his insides flip.

Lance felt as if he were going to be sick.

\-----------------------------------------------

 

Sleep did not come easily that night. Lance had tossed and turned, hidden his face beneath his blanket, counted to one hundred. Nothing worked. His mind was flooded with a million thoughts all at once, unable to process them as fast as they were coming. He just couldn't will himself to believe it. How could he be in space? How could he have followed him here?! Lance thought that he was finally rid of him for good. Being able to stash him at the very back of his mind and feeling that prideful sense of liberation.

This wasn't fair. Lance didn't want him here. The very thought of him breathing the same air was just... sickening. Eventually and mercifully exhaustion had taken it's toll and he fell into a daze of slumber.  
That morning, he woke with a feeling of dread as the previous night came back to him. He willed himself to calm down. It's a new day... don't worry. He's gone now. He can't do anything to you... this thought gave him the strength he needed to get up and dress himself.  
He slipped out of his room and made for the castle's kitchen. Maybe breakfast could get his mind off of his worries? He was famished anyway.

When Lance entered the kitchen he noticed Shiro by the sink rinsing something off. He gave a half smile, “Morning Shiro,” he greeted, grabbing himself a plate and making for the dispensers.  
“Hey Lance. You slept in longer than usual. I was about to go check on you. ” Shiro placed what Lance now saw a plate onto the clean pile beside him.

The brunet nodded and raised a curious brow at the leader. “Say, isn't Hunk usually on dish duty?”  
“He is. But I offered this morning. I didn't want him to have to leave the conversation they're having in the dining room.”  
“Hmm... that's nice Shiro.” he yawned, not paying much attention as he piled up a generous amount of goo onto his plate.

Gulping up the rest of his nervousness, he began to stride down to the dining room. His mind was buzzing with ideas of what he were to do today. Perhaps he and Lotor would be sent on a mission together? It would be nice considering their lack of interactions lately. It seemed as though everyone were trying their best to keep the two apart.

As he entered the dining room, his plate met with the floor, shattering into serrated pieces and splotching goo onto his shoes.  
Hunk, Pidge and Keith whipped their heads around in surprise at the sudden noise. Lance barely noticed their reactions as he stared at the head of the table, where the object of his anxieties sat.  
“Lance, good morning!” Jake waved from afar, a warm grin on his face. “Didn't expect me, huh? Sorry if I scared you. Here, let me help you with that.” he offered, pulling out his seat and preparing to get up.

Lance snapped out of his fright and shook his head quickly. “No, no! Stay there. I got it. Just continue with your story or whatever. I don't need your help.” he said, rather rudely as he bent down to scrape up his mess.  
“Oh well... okay?” Jake's smile ceased and his posture lost it's flare. He was clearly disappointed with Lance's choice of words.  
His friends looked at him incredulously as they noticed this.

Lance was quick to pile up the goo on the shards of the plate and lifted it off the ground, turning to make a quick departure when he was stopped by Shiro, who was just then entering.  
Shiro had to back up a bit as Lance nevertheless continued forward.  
When he attempted to step around him, Lance was quick to stop him with an arm out stretched. “What is he still doing here?” he hissed, causing for the black paladin to give him a frown.  
“What do you mean?”  
Lance edged his head back to the room and Shiro's frown deepened.  
“Jake? He's here so we can monitor this secret weapon he's been talking about. And it gives a good excuse for everyone to catch up with each other. I would have thought you of all people would want that.”

“Well, I don't!” Lance spat back.  
Shiro raised a brow at him. “What's gotten into you? You're not acting like yourself.”  
“Because I don't want him here. Anyone but him!”  
“Lance!” Shiro whispered, his gaze flickering into the dining room.  
Lance followed his eyes and saw that with the door left open he was in view of everyone present. He seized up when he noticed all the appalled stares he was receiving. Jake's it seemed just looked disappointed.

“Y... you heard me...” he stood straight, trying to look strong. As all that continued to watch him was unbelieving stares he briskly fled, finally allowing Shiro to step into the room.  
Why was he still here? It was bad enough that Lance had seen him the previous night, but to get up in the morning and find him making himself comfortable was not helping settle his worries.

“What was that all about?” Pidge's voice asked, causing him to stop. He took few steps back, trying to listen in on what they were saying.  
Shortly after the question was asked he heard a sigh. “It would have to do with our break up. I would have hoped he'd changed...”  
“Changed? What's that supposed to mean? Did something bad happen? Lance never gave us the details on it. He just said that you guys went your separate ways.”  
“Is that how he saw it? Well, it wasn't exactly a formal break up. You remember getting all my mail, right? The amount of letters I sent to him?”  
“Course we do. You sent them almost every day!”  
“Well... it was just that... after ages of waiting for him to write back, I got my letter. But what I read hurt me deeply...”

Lance's mind flashed to that day.  
He remembered how he had struggled to bring himself to write it. How terror gutted him as he made the decision.  
The note he had crumpled in his grasp as he made his way to the shipment bay. The feeling of terror was with him, boring into him with each step he got closer.  
It was when he handed the envelope to one of the workers that he finally managed to say something.

“He'll definitely get it... right?”  
The man behind the booth saw the concern on the brunet's face and he nodded. For the first time when entering the Garrison Lance saw one of the workers genuinely smile at him.  
“Of course. It will be posted tomorrow morning.”

The note. What everyone thought would be heart felt and tender. Was written by the hour with simple text and bane decree.

Don't talk to me.  
Don't ever send another letter to me again.  
I never want to see you again.  
We are done.  
Now get out of my life.

“Lance really wrote that? No way. He wouldn't...”  
Lance heard Hunk's disapproving speech as Jake finished his retelling of the break up.  
“That's terrible. To think he left the one nice guy to hit on space girls...” Pidge commented.  
“And to end up with Lotor.” Keith exhaled.

Lance shook his head and continued forward. He didn't want to hear this. He didn't want them thinking that of him. What else was he supposed to do? Let himself be miserable for the rest of his life just to impress some bastard that didn't really care for him.  
He felt bitterness begin to set in his stomach as memories of his past came flooding back. And he had a feeling that this was only the beginning.

\-----------------------------------

 

_“Ummmm.... is that seat taken?”_   
_Lance, who had been staring out the window to hide his sombre expression was startled when he suddenly heard a voice from behind. He turned to face the new comer and found a boy his age looking at him nervously._   
_His age was a guess. While his face looked young, his muscular body said otherwise._

_Lance looked around them, noting the many empty seats._   
_“I don't usually travel alone is all,” the stranger admitted, his cheeks turning scarlet as he noticed Lance's suspicions._   
_The brunet thought for a moment, before shifting forward and grabbing his bag. With a hard tug he managed to pull the bag off of the spare seats, now resting it beside himself._   
_“Thanks,” the stranger sighed and sat down heavily, causing for the booth to rattle a little. He mirrored Lance and placed his own items beside him._

_Lance turned to stare out the window again as the train pulled out of the station. Something else caught his attention. He could see sweat dripping down the stranger's forehead, darkening his yellow headband slightly._

_“Is it hot outside?” Lance asked._   
_“Huh? Oh. No it's not it's.... I'm just a little nervous. I'm not used to riding out in big machines...”_   
_Lance nodded and the stranger continued._   
_“And there's going to be a lot of people where I'm headed. I need to make sure I make a good impression. I mean, the only real person I've had to talk to most of the time is my aunt.”_

_Lance decided humour the new comer. “You live with your aunt?”_   
_“Yeah. Just me and her.”_   
_“Consider yourself lucky.”_   
_“Huh?” the stranger cocked his head._   
_Lance shifted so that he was now facing him and continued. “I've got a huge family back home. I mean, I love the guys. It has benefits, but sometimes you just want some alone time. Like, we share everything back there. I've had my little brothers burst in to brush their teeth when I was using the bath tub.”_   
_The stranger laughed at that and Lance joined in. He had to admit. He felt better talking to someone. It took his mind off of things._

_“Okay, that's pretty bad,” the stranger chuckled, before coughing into his hand to steady himself. “So... where are you off to anyway?”_   
_Lance hummed, resting his chin on his hand. “I'm setting off for the Garrison.”_

_The stranger's eyes widened and he sat up suddenly as if to verify his interest. “No way, really? That's where I'm going.”_   
_“Oh,” Lance said in surprise. “Wow, looks like we're going to be travelling together.”_   
_“Name's Lance.” he said, offering out a hand to shake._   
_The stranger took it and shook, his grip firm. “Nice to meet you. I'm Hunk.”_

\-----------------------

 

The door to Lance's room slid open and said person stepped out into the hall, a frustrated yawn exiting his mouth as he begrudgingly walked down the corridor. Another sleepless night. Terrific. Just what he needed. A bad night to go with his already bad day. Training had been particularly aggravating for him. Just a straight forward run through his course would have put his worries to rest for the time being. But of course, he had looked up to where Coran was monitoring. And who did he happen to see in the window watching him?  
Jake. That low life, selfish psychopath watched him like a hawk, never turning away to look at the others. It was no wonder Lance had been too distracted to see the druid coming for him.

The training had ended abruptly as he was thrown and planted into the wall. His friends had come to his aid, pointing out his sudden lack of concentration. The complaints only aggravated him and he swiped his bayard from Hunk, who was only trying to give it back and he marched out.

He hadn't meant to be so brash with them. But how could he be any different? He was just stressed.... Lotor was noticing it too. Lance was becoming distant from him. He felt guilty for it, but he needed to be alone.

Making it to the kitchen, he poured himself a glass of water and slurped it down. He hoped this would at least give him a few hours of relaxation. He'd laid in bed with his thoughts for four hours now and it was starting to get to him. He couldn't help it. Lance just couldn't get his mind off of Jake and how easily he had managed to slip himself into everyone's good book. Of course Jake always had Hunk and Pidge to land back on, and he had Keith's respect. But he was even getting golden stars from Allura and Shiro. Coran also held favour with the blond. This wasn't looking the best for Lance.

He hated this. He just wanted him to be gone.  
He placed the cup in the sink and crossed the kitchen, stepping back into the hall.

“Hey there.”

Lance froze up and he cautiously peered over his shoulder where he saw him. Jake appeared to have been waiting for him. He watched him, pridefully leaning against the wall with his arms folded.  
Lance immediately turned his head back and made for a quick escape.  
He could hear Jake matching his steps from behind and a hand grasped his left arm. Lance let out a short wail as he was pulled back and had his back thrust into the wall.  
Two hands locked onto his arms and held him in place, the hands owner grinning at him. “I missed you so much,” he said sweetly.

“Get off of me!”  
Jake bore a look of mourning as Lance shoved away, breathing heavily and glaring him down.  
Jake smiled again and raised his arms up around them. “No one's around. You don't have to hide it any more,” he took a step forward, making Lance shrink back. “I know you still love me.”

“No I don't!” Lance snapped back, putting as much venom in his voice as he could manage in this moment.

Jake sighed, his smile vanishing and being replaced with annoyance. “Are we really going to play this game? Because I'm not very patient after being ditched.”  
“I don't love you! Not after all that crap you pulled! And... I'm with Lotor!”

The exclamation made the blond scowl angrily and he folded his arms, head narrowing forward. “I thought your little game was cute to begin with and I played along. Now, it's just insulting. Lance I–”  
“I said no!”

Lance flinched as Jake pulled his fist back, preparing for a punch. Jake grit his teeth, his arm trembling as he forced it down to his side. “You are really tempting me...” he whispered. “You're lucky. The time we had together taught me how easy a person can stain with blood and bruises.”

Lance shook his head. He'd heard enough from the blond and he began passed him.  
Jake's arm shot out and hit the wall beside him, blocking Lance's pathway. “Where are you going? You weren't thinking of going to him, were you?”

Lance scowled at him. “I'm going to bed.”  
“Yours or his?” the demand made him wince. “Seriously Lance? We're all in the middle of a war and you do this? I mean really, a Galra? The thought itself is laughable. And you took it one step further by it being the prince. How in the world would you even want to be with that thing?”

Lance took in a deep breath. He'd had enough of submitting when things looked the worst for him. “You know what Jake. You're just jealous because you know you can't compete with him. And you can't fight for me either because you know he'd kick your butt.”  
“Can you really vouch for him?”

Lance thought for a moment. Comparing all the times he had spent with Lotor to his confining relationship back on Earth.  
The fights between the paladin and prince would end in apologies and reassurances. The passion of when they'd first kissed. How careful he was not to harm him. Lance wouldn't dream of going back to the person standing in front of him. Even if it the universe depended on it.  
“Yeah, I can.”

Jake sneered. “You do realise that he's playing you, right? He doesn't care about you. Nobody here does. You were always the screw up. That person at the end of the table. That little shit that didn't know when to shut up and wouldn't learn his lesson.”  
“You're full of it, Jake.” Lance spat.

The blond lifted his lips into a self reliant smirk. “Lotor probably only wants you for one thing. And when the two of you do the deed, he'll leave you. And then you'll have no where else to go but back home.” he whispered, placing a hand to his chest.

Lance glared, but said nothing. The two stood staring at each other for a long period of time. It was only when Jake's eyes widened that the silence was broken with a shrill voice as realisation hit.  
“You... you bastard! You wouldn't even sleep with me! And here you are prancing around this dump and whoring yourself off to everybody!”

Lance had prepared to retort, but he stopped himself. He couldn't continue this conversation. He needed to leave before it got out of hand.  
He swallowed hard, averting his eyes from the enraged man. “Goodbye Jake,” he muttered, then turned on his heel.  
“Don't you dare walk away from me!”  
The brunet ignored Jake's booming voice and continued for his room.  
“I am warning you!”  
He still refused to stop.  
“Lance!”  
Something hard hit the back of his head, making stars dance in his eyes. He felt himself fall to the ground and everything went black.

\----------------------------

 

The first thing Lance felt was the cold. The air around him was chilling despite the castle always being lukewarm. He could feel something or someone sliding his shirt up, which he assumed was the cause for the drop in temperature. His groggy mind was faintly aware of something wet remove itself from his mouth.

His eyelids were as heavy as boulders and with some effort Lance managed to force them open. It was hard with a throbbing headache making every movement he made painful. But he succeeded.

ZIP!  
Lance's eyes suddenly widened at the feeling of someone unzipping his pants. He lifted his head up where he saw Jake looming over him, too engrossed in tugging at the hem of his belt to notice him.  
A shriek ripped through his throat and the blond jumped back in alarm.  
His surprise to Lance suddenly waking was all that the brunet needed as his fist launched forward and struck his nose. Jake yelped and reared back, holding his face. Lance shoved the blond off of him and jumped to his feet where he found that he was not in any of the castle's rooms, but in one of the rebel ships. The sound of colossal engines humming around him made for his terror to escalate.  
In a panic, he stumbled out the door of the ship. His luck showed him that they hadn't left the castle, but Jake undoubtedly planned to once he was finished with him.

He felt Jake's hand lock around his arm, squeezing so hard he felt his fingers pressing into his bone. Another hand came out and hit his stomach, he knew it would leave a mark.  
“NO!” Lance cried out and began blindly punching the blond. He was rewarded with what felt like a jaw against his knuckles and he was immediately unhanded.

Lance darted for the door to the Shuttle bay and left the area in a fit of panic. He could hear Jake's screams of outrage not far behind him. This only made him run faster. He had to get to his room! He had to get away! Find someone at least!

As he turned the corner, Lance rammed into something broad and he jumped back in terror, expecting to meet his end. When he looked up however, he saw Lotor, staring down at him in alarm. Before he could say anything, Lance heard a screech of boots behind him as Jake rounded into the hall.  
Instincts kicked in and he ran to stand behind the prince, peering out to watch.

Jake's nose and mouth were covered in scarlet red. Lance hadn't realised how hard he had punched the man until now. The blond snarled, ignoring Lotor's presence and made his way for Lance, his fists clenched at his sides. “You fucking piece of shit! Get the hell over here–– !”

Lotor pushed him back roughly with a single hand. “ **Enough!** ”  
Lance found himself flinching at the anger in Lotor's voice, despite it not being directed at him. Jake stumbled a bit and sneered up at him, “Get out of my way Galra. He's had this coming since the day he– ” he paused as Lotor lowered his hand to his belt, unsheathing his sword slightly in warning.  
Jake watched it glimmer for a moment, his heavy breaths calming as he realised the threat. He swallowed and inhaled sharply, raising himself to stand straight. He looked calm despite the blood on his face. “Okay.... we'll talk about this later...” he whispered, voice trembling. “Does that sound good, Lance?”

Lotor moved to block Lance's view of the blond and retorted harshly. “Don't talk to him. If you wish to survive another night here then I suggest you leave for your quarters. Do I make myself clear?”  
Jake glowered up at the prince, before giving a defeated sigh. “Fine!” he barked, then turning back to Lance remarked. “Next time you won't have pretty boy here to save you!”  
He grunted in annoyance and whirled around, marching down the hall he had just come. Lotor watched him leave in what Lance assumed was indignation. Once the blond had left their sight, he finally turned and Lance shifted uncomfortably as he looked him over, suddenly feeling ashamed of himself.

“Are you alright?” he asked.  
Lance avoided eye contact, the feeling of a hard lump formed in his throat. “Yeah....”  
“You're trembling?”  
Lance scooted back as his hand came down on his shoulder. He looked up at him, realising the move was stupid, but he just couldn't help himself. Lotor looked bewildered by the action and he pulled his hand back. “What happened– ”  
“Can you walk me back to my room?” the question was asked in a single breath. Lance was almost sure Lotor didn't properly catch it as he blinked at him. He looked like he were about to say something about it, but he stopped himself.

There was a thin pause between them as Lance struggled to say anything else. He didn't want to explain that he didn't feel safe venturing these halls alone. He thankfully didn't have to as Lotor responded.  
“Yes.”

Lance nodded slowly, trying to appear happy, yet he couldn't strain himself to smile. He was scared of breaking down in front of him. He turned and they both made for his room.  
The walk was filled with silence as neither questioned each other. If Lance was in his right mind, he would have asked what Lotor was doing up at this hour. Yet all thoughts were lost. His mind was blank and numb. They took the elevator up to the next floor and Lance came to recognise the surroundings. They were close to his destination.  
He had to try and hold himself together before he got there. As they entered that particular hall, Lance felt as though it went on forever. He could feel his eyes beginning to sting, but forced himself to calm down.

As they made it to his door, he opened it without hesitation. He stepped in and was about to close the door behind him, when Lotor finally spoke up.  
“And you're certain you are alright?”  
Lance looked up to meet his eyes. He looked genuinely concerned about him. This made Lance feel guilty even further. “Yeah, I am...”

“Do you need me to stay?” he inquired, making the brunet grimace.  
“P-please. Just leave me alone. I can't see anyone right now...” he hated himself for saying that. But it was true.  
Lotor stepped back and allowed Lance to close up for the night. Before the door closed on him, Lance faintly whispered. “I'm fine...”

As the door clicked, he turned to face the darkness of his room. He let himself slump against the door. He listened and waited until he was completely alone. It took some time, but eventually he heard Lotor's steps going down the hall and he took a breath as he finally allowed himself to think of what just happened. What had almost happened.

Tears began to fall down his cheeks as the paladin sobbed. His sobs erupted into wailing as he began to bawl. He hated himself for lying to Lotor. He wanted to tell the truth. God, he wanted this to be over. But no matter what he tried, what he might do, Jake would never give him that chance of freedom he so desperately wanted.  
And he was going to have to accept that fact.


	2. Chapter 2

 

A loud swish sounded in the quiet corridor as the door shifted open and allowed few of the castle's occupants out. Looks of determination were present as they started down the hall to their crude destination.

Out of the three of them, Hunk was taking it the hardest. He couldn't believe that Lance was capable of such an attack. It wasn't the attack itself, it was the person he had used it on. Looking back, Jake was keeping an uncertain distance. Their eyes met and the blond shifted his gaze down. He undoubtedly felt guilty for telling them. But they were glad. Jake couldn't keep covering up for Lance's brash actions. The poor man even suggested that they leave the brunet alone. Even after Lance had broken his nose, he was still fond of him.

It was incredible that a guy like that existed and Lance should have seen the vast difference between Jake and Lotor. The team already preferred Jake over the prince. It was shocking to find Lance disliking him so much. Something about Jake being too clingy? The reason was unknown, but they were to find answers this morning.

They stopped by the other paladin's door and Pidge rapped on it three times to announce their arrival.

The three listened, not hearing any sounds of movement inside. Nor did they get a response to the knock. Lance wasn't fooling anyone.

“We know you're in there,” Pidge called.

A hollow silence ensued. The three gave each other few glances and Hunk spoke up in turn.

“Hey buddy, you've got some explaining to do. Coran found Jake with a broken nose last night and he said you gave it to him,” he said.

When they were yet again met with no reply, he continued.

“Well did you?”

A low grumble sounded behind the door and a hoarse voice finally responded. “Yeah... I did.”

So he really was guilty then...

“Why would you do that?” Pidge exclaimed, scowling at the door.

“Maybe he deserved it, ever think of that?!” he snapped back.

That was not the right response to give. It only made them angrier with him.

“Why did he deserve that? Okay, so you guys got into a fight last night. But that doesn't mean you can just attack him like that,” Hunk asserted.

Jake sighed lowly behind them, and took a step forward. “I didn't mean for him to get so mad. I just wanted to know if he was safe being with Lotor and all. I guess I got carried away with my suspicions....” his eyes shifted down.

“Oh, you pushed the Lotor button,” Pidge sighed. It wasn't the first time Lance had irrationally scolded someone for questioning his relationship choice. But the physical attack was new to his routine.

Jake gave the two a nervous smile and pointed to the door uncertainly. They responded with a nod of affirmation and he moved closer to the barrier. He spoke gently and soothingly, the type of voice one wouldn't expect to hear a person speaking to their attacker with. “Hey, Lance. I'm here too. Listen, if I said anything that upset you last night, then I'm sorry. I was just worried about you. But, I understand.” He placed a delicate hand on the door and whispered. “I forgive you.”

Something thudded loudly against the other side of the door, causing the blond to jump back in surprise. He looked to Hunk and Pidge, bewildered by the sudden attack. 

The two immediately replaced their looks of surprise to disdain.

Pidge leaned toward the door. “Well fine. If you're going to be like that then you can just stay in there instead of making up.”

“Good! Now go away!”

Lance's incurable behaviour painted a fiercer picture for his friends and the two shook their heads in disbelief. Hunk shifted his gaze back to the blond. Something that looked like outrage was quickly replaced with sorrow. He supposed even Jake's patience was beginning to wane.  
Disregarding his anger, he gave the blond a friendly pat on the shoulder. “Sorry Jake, he isn't normally like this.”

Jake in turn gave the man a kind smile, “It's fine. I understand. Who am I to intrude?”

“You're not intruding on anything. You're a great help and a good friend,” he assured. He turned back to the door and sighed. “We'll let him calm down. He has to come out eventually, right?”

“Yeah, we're going to have to,” Pidge responded flatly. “C'mon.”

The group left Lance to deal with his own demons.

Hunk watched the door over his shoulder as they went. Lance was the first friend he'd made at the Garrison. The two had been the best of friends. Always siding with each other on matters that would harm either of them, sticking up for one another. This time was different.

It was difficult to side with someone else, but after what had transpired, he couldn't any other way. He hoped he would understand in the future when he and Jake were on friendly terms.

As they disappeared down the hall, no one heard the muffled sobs that someone had been trying to hold in.

 

\-----------------------------------------------

 

 

“ _Whoa, Lance. What happened to your eye?”_

_Lance looked up from his food tray. He had just sat down and had already roused his friends from their conversation. He was hoping it wasn't noticeable, but from their expressions he was more than a little wrong._

“ _That looks painful, how'd you get it?” Pidge enquired, adjusting his glasses._

**Tell them what happened...**

_That voice was back again. His inner ego which was the cause for most of his actions had returned. It had been ignored for so long now that he didn't see any real reason to pay it any mind. Telling himself everything is fine would always win the internal struggle. But he would be lying if he pretended to never consider the possibility that something was deeply wrong._

_Lance paled as eyes continued to linger on him and he brushed a hand over his right eye. “What this? This is just a souvenir I got from one of the guys. Turns out Jennifer's taken,” he grinned sheepishly, expertly hiding his pain from the worried faces of his friends._

**What are you doing? Don't do this to yourself again!**

_Pidge and Hunk's concerned faces didn't last long after the statement and the two gave him scowls._

“ _Well, serves you right then. Sure the Garrison has a lot of cute girls, but you have a boyfriend.” Pidge scolded._

_Lance's fake smile left him and he glared back at the two. Their words hurt more than the bruise on his face. “Yeah, I guess....” he mumbled, removing his hand from his swollen eye and sitting it on the bench in front of him._

**Stop protecting him!**

Hunk shifted uncomfortably as he watched the normally boastful brunet's actions, finding it unlike him to behave. “Hey, seriously. Is everything alri–”

“ _Hey, hey, what's going on over here?” a voice called from across the mess hall. The group looked up to see Jake slowly approaching with his own food. The blond was beaming as usual, playing the role of sunshine._

_He took a seat beside Lance, and eyed Pidge and Hunk curiously. “So what are you guys talking about?”_

_Hunk, finding no reason to continue the question now that the blond was present edged his head towards Lance._  
_Jake's eyes followed and he gasped when he saw him. “Oh Lance! What happened?” he asked, his overbearing niceness card which fooled everyone was once again drawn out from his deck. How many times had Lance heard it now? At first it was something he truly believed was genuine and quickly forgave him for every bad deed he committed. Now Lance had grown to despise the voice. It only brought on fear and disgust._  
__  
**He is such a liar...**

_Lance lowered his head to his food tray to hide his expression and responded. “It's nothing serious...” he sighed._ _A hand gripped onto his arm and he was yanked up to stand. The sudden action caused a surprised gasp to leave his mouth and he turned to glance at the blond._ _Jake's caring persona was in full capacity, making his actions that much more convincing. “Oh no, we're taking you to the nurse. You could have bleeding behind your eye Lance! Come with me.”_ **Don't go with him...** _Lance stumbled forward as he was pulled along._

“ _Thanks Jake,” Hunk called as they two grew further from the table._

_Lance turned his head and gazed back to his friends. The two had once again settled with the conversation they were having before his arrival. They remained blissfully unaware, making Lance's pace slow. It quickened when he was tugged again, the hand on him leading him to where he could no longer see them._

“ _I'm sorry I hurt you, but I'll make it up to you. I promise,” the blond whispered, turning his head to smile back at him._

**He doesn't mean it. Don't listen to him!**

“ _Now, when we go back in there you're going to smile and hold my hand.”_

“ _Why?” Lance turned to meet his gaze._

 _Jake's hard expression made him flinch. “If anyone found out what happened we'd be separated. Do you have any idea how hurt I would be to lose you again? It would be selfish if you told anyone.”_  
_Jake's words made him feel worse than he already did. Lance fought to keep his tears at bay, worried that it would only resort in more trouble._

“ _I'm sorry, Jake,” he mumbled out._

“ _It's okay. I forgive you,” the blond responded, planting a quick peck on his cheek. “I love you.”_

 _He wanted to say no. He wanted to tell him that he was a monster. A snake. The very bane of his existence. This wasn't love. This was something else._  
_Despite this, he felt himself nod and he put on a fake smile. The voice finally having gone silent. “I love you too.”_

\-----------------------------------------------

 

“Don't!” Lance cried out, having stirred himself awake. He took a long breath of air, trying to coax himself into a calm demeanour. It took him a while of reruns of the previous year to remember where he was.

He shifted his head and gazed around the room, finding it was still his own.

The sheets beneath him were soaked with sweat and when he sat up a chill wafted over him. He shivered lightly, partly from the cold and his own emotions.

Turning his head to his right, he found his tablet lying beside his hand. He'd been playing with it before exhaustion took over him. Without so much as a wink of sleep the previous night he could understand how easy it was for him to lose himself.

The soreness on his eyes told him he hadn't slept long and he sighed heavily. The paladin swung his legs over the side of his bed, placing his head in his hands as the nightmare lingered in his mind.

He'd almost forgotten about that time. It seemed that the longer the blond remained here the more his memories tormented him. And new ones at that.

He could feel that the bruise on his arm was still present and as he bend forward his stomach cramped where the fist had been.

Those weren't the only marks he found. Earlier he had given himself a full inspection, finding that there was a bruise he wasn't aware of like the rest. With the aide of an Altean mirror he had found some time ago, he had looked over the wound.

Where his neck met his shoulder he found indents in his skin, drawing a circular shape to connect the dots.

Overnight the mark had turned a dark shade of red and grown sore to the touch. He wasn't positive as to what it was, but the idea that he was at some point bitten was the most plausible. It had to have been done when he was unconscious. He wasn't sure what else happened while he was out. Part of him didn't want to know.

His heart sank in his chest as he remembered waking to the violation. All the pieces of himself that he had rebuilt were slowly crumbling. Once again Jake had managed to knock them down.

He felt bitter tears sting at the corners of his eyes. He was disgusted with himself. How could he let this happen? If he hadn't triggered the blond then maybe none of this would have happened.

He wanted to tell someone. He wanted nothing more than to be rid of this deviant for good. But Lance wasn't strong enough. Too much time had passed for that. No one would ever believe such an inconceivable story.

The bedroom door slid open, allowing the light of the hall to pierce through the darkness. Lance, who had been startled by the sudden interruption jumped to stand, almost losing his footing, but catching himself before he fell.

His moment of panic was dulled down when he saw who it was. As his eyes adjusted to the light his tense stance lowered and he took a breath. “Jeez Lotor, you know there's a thing back on Earth we call knocking,” he chided, casting a lour in the prince's direction.

Ignoring the scolding, Lotor remained undeterred. “We need to talk,” he said immediately.

Lance deflated. He knew this conversation would happen eventually. He'd only hoped it wasn't so soon. He turned away, running a hand through his hair and trying to be casual.

Despite already knowing the answer he asked, “About what?”

“About what happened last night,” he answered.

Lance sighed and shrugged. “I punched Jake in the face and he got mad at me. You know that, you were there. Well, not for the punching part of it.”

“Is that all?” Lotor asked, not sounding convinced.

“Yeah pretty much,” the paladin responded and turned to face him. He flinched back when he noticed the prince was now in front of him. Lance had barely paid any attention to him coming into the room.

Lotor noticed his discomfort immediately. Lance never had a problem with closeness before.

“Is something wrong?”

“No, nothing's wrong, why would you think something's wrong?” he blurted out.

Lotor frowned at him. Lance's speech was a give away and the brunet paled when he realised.

“I'm fine is what I meant..” he quickly added.

Lotor shook his head. “You're not fine. You've been hiding away in your quarters for the past day without even allowing yourself to leave for important things such as food.”

“I'm not hungry,” Lance dismissed.

The rumbling in his stomach exposed him for a liar, causing him to blanch. What wonderful timing it had...

“I see,” Lotor murmured, arching an eye brow at him.

Lance grimaced. Oh, so that's how he was going to be. It seemed as though Lotor was only intimidating when Lance was trying to hide something. Lance was a good liar, but Lotor was talented with seeing through people. Lance did not want to play this game, and he tried to assert himself.

“Why can't you leave me alone like everybody else? Just give me some down time,” he exclaimed.  
“I've been doing just that. And now I want to discuss what exactly I saw last night,” the prince remarked.

Lance inhaled slowly, growing impatient. “Ask any of them. They'll tell you what happened.”

“You would rather I have their opinion over your own?”

“If it'll make you leave faster,” Lance folded his arms too tightly to be taken as calm.

The two shared a glare. They both knew Lotor wasn't going to leave without an explanation. Lance had to think of a lie to tell. However, his mind was a mess.

He cocked his head sideways, gazing at the open door behind him. Maybe if he ran now he could avoid this conversation. But for how long?

Lotor started again, this time taking a different approach. “Lance, what was the nature of your last relationship?”

“What?” Lance's eyes drew back to the prince, taken off guard by the question. “What do you mean?”

“With Jake. From what I've heard it was romantic. I want to know if it were anything else?”

For the first time that would surely be many that evening, Lance found his tongue tied. Memories of a screaming face looming above flashed in his mind and he involuntarily winced. This only notified the prince that this was a hard subject. “It was fine. I mean, it was....”

“Bad?” Lotor offered.

Lance inched backwards. “I didn't say that.”

“What were you going to say then?”

“Stop it,” Lance was struggling now. He wasn't in the shape to have an argument with anyone. Lest his emotions reveal everything for him. “Just... stop..”

The two stood in a gritty silence. Lance shifted his eyes elsewhere. The quiet didn't help calm his nerves, it only made him anxious as to what the prince was thinking.

Lotor's hand moved for his shoulder, but he caught himself halfway. He appeared to decide against his own actions and pulled it back to rest under his chin.

He stared at him as if looking for something. Whatever he was looking for, he must have found it as his eyes narrowed.

“Why are you protecting him?” Lotor hissed, catching Lance's attention again.

His arms dropped by his sides and his face grew angered. “I'm not protecting him! I wouldn't.”

“Yet you are.”

“No I'm not!” Lance shouted. The room fell into a silence. The brunet lowered his gaze and fought the urge to cry. “Get out...”

“Lance, I am trying to be patient with you.”

“Patient for what? What do you think happened?!” he shrieked. He could feel tears start to well up in his eyes. All the frustration, exhaustion and pain dug into him. All his friends had chosen another. Had chosen a heartless rapist over the poor excuse for a paladin. Now even Lotor had succumbed to harassing him.

“It doesn't matter! Why can't you just leave me alone?! I told you nothing happened.... nothing happened! He didn't touch me––!”

“ **Then why are you limping?** ”

Lance's speech caught in his throat. His mouth clamped shut. He.... didn't hear that right, did he? Those words made tingles trace down his spine. His face paled, heart stopped.

Lotor continued, his voice hard.

“Do you think I didn't notice the wince you made when you stood? Or how apprehensive you have been of your surroundings? Perhaps even how you have been behaving ever since that boy came here. You have isolated yourself, suffered mood swings and this only began when he arrived. I know exactly what is going on. I only wish I hadn't had to say it myself.”

Lance stood frozen, letting the final words sink in. The room grew silent, much like the sky after a hard storm. The brunet wasn't trembling. He wasn't even blinking. He'd been resorted to a life like statue, unknowing what to do.

Lotor backed up as if wondering if he had gone too far and quickly composed himself, speaking more calmly. “You were defending yourself last night. And he lied about it, didn't he?”

Lance attempted to deny the statements, but the words never came. What did manage to slip out was a whisper.

“How long have you known?”

“The moment he appeared I knew something was wrong. I only began piecing this together after last night's confrontation.”

Lance's knees felt brittle and ready to shatter under his weight. The room felt surreal. It was as though the space around him was moving. He finally took his eyes off of the prince and forced them onto the floor. He was more lost than he was before.

“Why didn't you tell me?”

Lance's head shot up again. There was a thin line between sadness and anger. “How am I supposed to admit something like that? No one would believe me if I told them. That's why I had to keep it a secret. I can't let anyone see me like this... I.. no one has ever....” he choked on the last of his sentence. It was becoming harder to speak. He forced himself to carry on, his vision blurred and his ferocity wavered. “It can't be that easy... It's never been that easy! How did you notice any of that? No one has ever noticed! And if they did, they didn't care...”

Lotor stepped forward to say something else, but the paladin continued.

“That's not fair.... how come when I give up people start doing something about it?” he whispered more to himself than Lotor.

“Lance–”

“Don't! Don't pity me! I shouldn't even be... this shouldn't be getting to me... we're in a war.. how is this eating me? This isn't even the worst thing to happen to someone. Look at Shiro, Allura.... everybody...” he began shaking all over and looked to Lotor in desperation. “Well look at them!”

“I am looking. But I'm looking at you,” he said firmly. “Don't you dare for a second lower yourself because of what others have experienced. He has hurt you. If it were in my right, I would have him suffer for what he's done. However, exposing him is the alternative.”

The quiet returned for a short moment.

Lance inched back, a haunted glint in his eyes. “Lotor, you can't tell anyone about this.”

Lotor scowled. “Why not? What good would come of it if he was to leave without a single scar on his name? Your team should know what he has done and further more should tend to you.”

“No, Lotor. I'm meant to brush these things off! I never let anything hurt me. I have to be strong. _They_ have to think I'm strong... if they knew, they'd never see me as anything else,” he sobbed. “I'm not weak, Lotor!”

Lotor's annoyance was subdued and replaced with empathy. “No one is calling you that. And you cannot be strong at all times,” he stated, being extra careful to make every word sound meaningful. “I can't promise you that you will stop hurting. But I can promise that this will stop. Even if I myself have to take action. He won't touch you again.”

Those words seemed to cut into him and pierce that barrier that was now barely standing. His emotions finally escaped him. He tried his best to keep them at bay, but failed. When the first tear fell the others followed. He bowed his head and placed his palm over his eyes. He was trying to hide the heartache that was spilling from him, but the whimpering was a good indicator.

Lotor's hand finally made contact with his shoulder. It was the first kind gesture he had gotten since Jake had come here and it was the thing that finally broke through to him. The brunet brushed the gloved hand away from his shoulder and moved in closer.

The once proud paladin broke down and clutched the taller man. He was the first one to see through his proud exterior. Somehow managing to have a better understanding of his emotions than most of his friends, despite Lance knowing them longer.

Finally, after a long moment that was possibly hesitation, he felt two hands rest on his head and back.

This somehow comforted him enough to allow his sobs to die down. They were still present, but his breathing calmed significantly.

“This is not your fault,” Lotor said after a long moment.

“But I let it happen,” Lance's sentence was a mess, wracked with sobs and gasps. “I put up with it for years! I never tried to fight him but... it happened. Something happened last night and I snapped. So I hit him and now... everybody hates me. They won't even try to listen to me now!”

“They need to know. If they don't, he will continue to dwell here.”

“I can't do it...”

“Yes you can. You are stronger than this,” Lotor urged.

His words were comforting, but it would be a long time before Lance could truly believe them.

“It's not that easy.... I don't even know what to say. It's too hard. I can't...”

“I can.”

Lance peeled back to glance up at him, frowning at what he had heard. “So what? You're going to tell everybody that their hero is actually a psycho monster? Because I don't think they'd believe that... from me or you.”

“I am very persuasive,” Lotor offered.

“I don't know...”

“I persuaded you to give me a chance, didn't I?”

Despite the tense situation, a small snort escaped the paladin. Lotor rarely did crack jokes. When he did, they always seemed to have meaning to them... In this moment they certainly did.

“So... you'd warm everybody up before... before I said anything?”

“If that is what you want.”

Lance stared at him before at last cracking a smile. He dipped his head back down and soaked in the cold chill of Lotor's chest plate. He was always the one to go to in these troubling times. The one who would be patient with him and lend support. He was the opposite of Jake in a way. Both cunning in personality, but still different. One was love, the other was control. How did he ever confuse the two?

Lance sank further into the soft embrace and let himself drift away from his painful memories which seemed so long ago now.

“Thank you.”

\-----------------------------------------------

 

Lotor proceeded to the bridge as running water echoed from the castle's showers. Apparently Lance was more worried about his physical appearance than getting something to eat. It was very hard to convince the paladin to leave his room. Lance was very apprehensive and it hurt Lotor knowing that he was now scared of walking these halls. A relaxing shower would help silence the brunet's nerves, he needed it.

The prince on the other hand was far from relaxed.

Regardless to the tenderness he had shown earlier, his eyes cast a vengeful lour.

Lance had an abuser once? An abusive lover at that.

To realise something such as that was mind boggling. It was unthinkable. Lance was much too cheerful to be expected to have a past such as that. He supposed Lance acted the way he did was because he had the freedom to do so. It was his liberation.

Was that why Lance was so apprehensive when they started? Did he think that because they were once enemies that Lotor would do the same to him?

It sickened him to think that.

There was a part of Lotor that was furious with the brunet for keeping this information from him. Lance never kept secrets from him. If he had told him this from the start he could have done something about it.

The revelation was all the more shocking when he thought back to when they were still in secret about their romance. Back when it was them against everything. The trust they shared was special, Lotor couldn't properly trust anyone. But he did Lance and to know that he brunet couldn't share the same reliance to tell him something so important, it was hurtful.

Another part of him was angry with himself. He should have known that Lance's insecurities came from somewhere. In all his years he should have noticed the signs sooner. And yet he never questioned them.

Lotor turned into the next hall and his eyes caught sight of his foe.

Jake strode up the hall and his eyes lit up when he saw the prince. A bitter grin spread across his face as they neared each other, the blond even going as far as to spread his arms out. “Lotor, hey~!”

Just seeing the blond caused his nerves to shift. “ **You,** ” Lotor said harshly, catching the blond off guard. “You have some nerve allowing yourself to be in my presence at this time.”

Jake paused a few feet in front of him and raised a brow. “We're being a little rude, aren't we? Don't I get an apology for last night or at least a thank you for not dobbing on you?”

Lotor took a threatening step forward. Jake shuffled back.

His fake smile evaporated. “So you're still mad about that? Okay...” he sighed, but continued. “Galra's really can hold grudges. Seriously what does Lance see in you?” he clucked his tongue.

He was clearly trying to taunt him. If not for Lotor having spent years controlling his own emotions this could have worked.

“You had your chance with him. The only one you can blame is yourself,” he retorted.

Jake's scowl returned. “Are you calling me the bad guy? What about you Mr?”

Lotor arched a brow. “What of me?”

Jake crossed his arms with a sneer. “You think I don't know what you're up to? Come on, we both know you're going to betray these guys eventually and Lance... he was an easy target to gain trust around here, isn't that right?” he scoffed. “Well, whatever you're planning, I'm going to be here to protect him. Lance needs me.”

“He needs you?” Lotor spoke lowly, a sharp edge in his voice.

“Now you've got it!” Jake grinned. “While your relationship is barely standing, I'll have you know the one Lance and I shared was pure and beautiful. This...” his eyes flicked over Lotor. “This isn't beautiful. In fact it's sick.”

Lotor's eye twitched at the insult. While the relationship between Lance and himself had it's flaws, it was nothing compared to what Jake had written in the paladin's past.

“From what I've heard your relationship was not beautiful. In fact it was sadistic on your part,” he hissed back.

The shock on Jake's face made Lotor realise this was a first for him. Being caught in an act he had so cleverly covered up was new to the blond. Lotor took pleasure in removing that boy's smile. “Yes, he has notified me of your noxious persona,” he added, watching the blond's face scrunch up in anger.

“That little snitch...” Jake seethed.

“From this conversation alone I can see that everything he has told me about you is true. You are quite the bottom feeder.”

Jake was visibly struck by the insult. “So I'm the villain for loving him so much that I did everything I could to protect him?!” he growled.

Lotor was taken back by the outburst. Protect?

“I loved him. I still love him. And I won't let some monster from the other side take him away from me! I'm here for him just like I've always been. He just doesn't understand all the things I've done for him. He doesn't understand how the world works. All those friends, all those people he'd talk to would just hurt him. But I wouldn't. I was always there for him. So I had to take it upon myself to make sure he wouldn't betray me again. I always made up for the times I hurt him even though he didn't deserve it. I went out of my way to empty my wallet for gifts just so he would start talking to me again! So you see Lotor, I'm not the one to blame. Everything would be perfect if he didn't constantly run away and hurt me. I'm the one who's being affected. He's been nothing but selfish and rotten to the core!”

Lotor's stare was cold. “You are completely mad.”

He straightened up to his full height and glared down the blond. It was now his turn to share his beliefs. “You are without a doubt the most addled creature I have come to witness. While you are wallowing in your own self pity, Lance is out here defending the universe and you only care about having him as your own. It doesn't matter what he has accomplished without you, does it? You ignore it and pretend you are superior. I know your type.”

He loomed over him, the blond's brazen posture lowering. “You're a pathetic disgrace to your people and your cause. That much is clear.”

Jake snarled angrily and reared back to throw a punch. As the fist came Lotor caught it, holding onto it with a tightening grip. The blond yelped and cowered back, trying to pull his fist from the prince's deafening hold.

“This proves everything,” his eyes moved from Jake to his hand.

“Fuck you!” the blond screamed, eyes filling with tears as Lotor's grip painfully blocked off circulation to his hand.

Lotor's eyes rolled, before settling on the arm that he had hold of. Holding it up higher, he inspected the purple plating on the blond's arm. He had stated it was Galran technology. His eyes darkened as he looked it over, his lip curling back into a snarl. “This is fake.”

“Aah! Give it back! You shouldn't be touching that!” Jake snapped, at last wrenching himself free from the painful hold. He held his hand close to him and rubbed it gently, hissing lowly.

Lotor stared down the blond. He understood everything now. This disgusting man was a ruse.

“Enjoy your fortune while it lasts,” he hissed and stepped passed the blond, resuming toward his destination.

“What does that mean? Hey! Hey come back here! Y-you can't!” Jake called out from behind.

Lotor was now more than ever determined to be rid of this insect. He had managed to turn everyone on Lance. And now, Lotor was going to turn them on him.

“Fine, gonna be like that. I'll go see what Lance thinks about your behaviour!”

Lotor stopped up ahead, the exclamation triggering him. He turned his head halfway, voice a fierce whisper. “You would find that keeping your distance from him would be wise.”

Jake's face lit up and he grinned at having provoked the Galra. “Oh! A soft spot. Didn't think you people had one.” Jake clucked his tongue, “I'll go wake Lance up,” he twisted his body and prepared to turn, but stopped himself to watch Lotor's reaction.

Lotor turned to him, face set in a scowl. “He is busy.”

“Really?” Jake's lips quirked and began to slowly make his way up to where Lotor stood. “Too busy being in his room?”

Lotor's eyes narrowed at the man as he stopped in front of him.

Jake frowned, then grinned again. “Ooh.. so he's not in his room? Where is he?” his eyes drifted around them.

“You should change your attitude,” Lotor warned, his patience falling frighteningly low.

“What? I'm just curious,” Jake said innocently. “So, whereabouts is the guy? The kitchen, the training deck, showers?..”

Lotor's eyes twitched at the word, he hadn't meant to. But Jake caught on.

“The showers! So he's cleaning himself. Well in that case, maybe I should go in there and finish what he started?”

Lotor had long since considered calming himself and came forward fiercely at the comment. “You will not touch him!” he shouted.

Jake crossed his arms and smiled, overjoyed that his torment was working. “Alright fine, so he's still butthurt from last night. Don't suppose he'd mind having a gobble then?”

Lotor tensed. There was always a barrier between self control and violence. Where he had trained himself not to make any irrational actions, or go forth with something without thinking. That wall had crumbled.

Jake's grin fell as he watched Lotor move. It all happened so quickly. He saw the glint of Lotor's sword and the blade swiped through the air with ease. Jake backed up and felt the tendons in his upper arm split in a single cut. Drops of scarlet hit the wall behind him as his arm opened up in a sprinkling ray of blood.

Jake's mouth stretched open in horror and a high pitched shriek tore through the hall. Adrenaline kicked in and he ducked down, barely missing another swing of the long blade and began a mad dash down the corridor.

“Help me! Someone help me!” he cried and held his arm close to him in an effort to stop the bleeding.

Lotor was in pursuit. Now he was the one being chased. He would be the one suffering.

Jake was in full panic. Lotor wasn't like the others. He wasn't easily convinced. He couldn't talk his way out of this, he'd talked himself into this. Jake only now realised his mistake in goading the prince. He wasn't the one with the upper hand any more. He was in danger and he couldn't even fight back.

He skidded to turn into the next corridor, his ankle twisted at the force of the abrupt turn and he fell hard onto his side. Jake cried out as his already injured arm broke his fall and he began to smear blood on the floor as he tried to lift himself up.

His eyes moved towards Lotor who paced toward him menacingly. Jake rolled onto his haunches and scooted back until he met with the wall behind him. He trembled, on the verge of tears as to what was to come.

Lotor couldn't help but think about how insignificant the blond was in this moment. How many times had he backed Lance into a corner and made him fear for his life? Now Jake would understand what it felt like.

Lotor's sword rose up, preparing to slice through the blond as he covered his eyes. As it came down a loud clank echoed in the hall as it met with another blade.

Lotor turned his head to meet with Keith's furious stare.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Took a month to update, but it's here!  
> Again, i am really sorry about the cliffhangers in this. I seem to like ending on dramatic scenes... Please tell me what you think in comment section! I'd really love to hear your thoughts. ;)


	3. Chapter 3

 

 

“Come on, you can do this,” Lance whispered under his breath, staring at himself in both shame and annoyance. How long had he been standing there? Ten minutes? Twenty? It felt more like an hour and considering now that his hair had completely dried from his shower he guessed it was the most plausible time span.

Lance looked up from his reflection to note the shower behind him. It had long lost it's steam and the room had visibly grown more lukewarm than the heat the shower had given it.

Yep, an hour was doing it for him.

He was stalling. He couldn't help it.

His shower had calmed him momentarily, but with the knowledge of what he were about to do it made it all the more difficult to leave.

Lance thought that listening to himself breathing would help calm his nerves. It was a tactic he was once told could help with any anxieties and stress related subjects. Unfortunately Lance found it stubbornly false as the fierce beating of his heart remained hard and vigorous.

He looked down at his legs and found himself glaring. He could walk out of here and go to the bridge like he had planned. And yet his legs refused to even budge.

“Lance you are pathetic...” he hopelessly mumbled.

Lotor believed that he could do it. He encouraged him earlier, profusely even to tell everyone of his plight and demand they be rid of their unwanted guest.

Lance liked to believe that he was tough like Shiro, or maybe even on some level near Lotor. But in this moment he only saw himself as a sad and scared child about to be scolded.

How could he not when he was hiding in here rather than face the problem?

The sound of feet entering the room echoed from his right just out of reach of the mirror's view. Lance whirled around, half not knowing who and half expecting an irritated Lotor to have come looking for him because of his lateness.

Lance was both surprised and relieved to see that instead of the image he'd put in his mind it was Hunk who had come looking for him. Lance was still furious by the fact that Hunk had gone to his room that morning to defend the blond, but he hid his frustration for the time being.

A pin of concern slowly inched into the back of Lance's head as he noted his friend's posture and face. Hunk did not look happy to see him. He almost seemed to be holding himself back from saying something he might regret.

Despite the nature surrounding his friend, Lance sparked up casual conversation, pushing back his own worry. “Oh, hey Hunk. What's up?” Lance smiled. He supported his weight on his elbow and leaned it against the wall beside him. His voice lacked the enthusiasm he had gained through his years, sounding all the more staged and concealing another emotion.

Whether Hunk noticed this or not, his expression remained unwavering. “You should get in the bridge,” he announced flatly.

Lance's smile evaporated. _Did I leave it too late?_ “Oh... sure,” he said awkwardly.

Hunk turned and exited the room, Lance shortly following.

The entire walk there Hunk never looked at him. Lance's nervous mania intensified as they neared the bridge. He didn't know what to expect. Had Lotor told anyone of Lance's predicament and received the reaction he had feared of? Or were they hatching some kind of debate that only Lance himself could solve?

Muffled voices sounded in the hall as they approached the door. Lance paused and listened, now wishing he could take back all that he had confided in his partner.

“Then why didn't he say anything earlier?” Keith's angry voice seeped through the barrier and earned a tempered groan.

“Because he was afraid. Is it really that hard for you to see?” That one was Lotor's...

The door opened as Hunk entered. Lance hesitated, but soon followed. The room had fallen quiet as they came in, Lance looked over each face his friends bared for him.

Allura had turned to face him, a dark scowl firmly planted in her features as her eyes found the brunet. Keith's expression matched Allura's, both appeared disdained by his presence despite him being asked to come here.

Shiro's eyes narrowed at him, from the distance it almost looked as though he were trying not to be angry but ultimately failing. Pidge was the same as Hunk, holding barely any emotion. Even Coran looked disappointed by Lance's arrival.

Lance finally found Lotor standing by Keith. The prince's eyes flickered in his direction, but drew downward in guilt.

Then there was Jake in the middle. The blond appeared the most enraged out of the group. His nose wrinkled and his eyes blazed forth a type of hatred Lance had seen too many times to count.

“Lance, I take it you know why you are here?” Allura said, her tone matching her face.

Lance shrugged awkwardly in response. “Not really...” he murmured, then turned to Lotor for answers. What had happened while he was gone? Why was everyone behaving so balefully toward him? It was in this instant that he noticed the cuffs that were secured around the prince's wrists. Lance blanched. “What the– why's Lotor handcuffed?!” he exclaimed, resulting in a scoff from Keith.

“You know why,” the raven growled.

Keith relented as Allura motioned him aside, understanding his anger, yet knowing it would get them nowhere. When her stare was back on Lance her expression hardened.

“Lotor tried to kill Jake.”

Lance gasped. He looked to Lotor. The prince, who he now realised had been staring at him dropped his gaze to the floor. Lance could read him like a book and his stomach grew heavy as he saw the shame that was written on his partner. He'd only seen Lotor like this once. When he was doubting himself and in this moment he was truly penitent for his misdeeds. Disgusted with himself for not having better control over his actions.

“This has to be a mistake,” Lance looked away from Lotor and faced his friends.

“Mistake? Lotor nearly kills me and it's a mistake?” Jake whispered incredulously.

Lance risked a glance in the blond's direction, but stopped himself halfway.

“Jake's arm was sliced open when Keith found him, he also found Lotor looming over him with his sword. I'm not sure what that would look like to you, but it is abundantly clear to everyone what happened,” Allura stated.

“Check the cameras. They would have picked up everything!” Lance urged them to give reason, but it ended up no where in turn.

“We don't need to because I saw everything,” Keith scowled.

The two paladin's shared a glare, Lance's more out of cynicism than Keith's accusing one.

“Jake probably started it!” the brunet said without missing beat, frustration guiding his words.

His team was visibly struck by the outburst, then suddenly more angry than Lance had expected.

“Lance, Jake was attacked _by_ Lotor. Does that mean nothing to you? Are you really defending Lotor after what he did to him?” Shiro remarked disdainfully.

Lance blushed, but refused to back down. “I'm not happy about it. But I think he got what he deserved.”

“What?!”

Lance recoiled as Hunk and Pidge shouted in unison. If all his previous retorts hadn't pierced that barrier of vexation from his friends this statement surely did.

“Lance, how could you?” Jake mournfully asked, appearing as if Lance's statement truly hurt him. An act laid out as bait and his team was foolish enough to take it for Jake's pain only fuelled their anger.

“Jake's the nicest guy you could ever meet. How does he deserve to be chased down and threatened?” Pidge scoffed. “What has he ever done to you?”

It was impossible for his team to know all that had been done, yet in spite of his own anger Lance didn't care.

“He's been harassing me ever since he got here! He won't leave me alone and on top of all of that he's– ”

“He's been trying to make amends for you guys splitting up! Dammit Lance, how are you this insensitive?” Keith barked. “With the way you've been acting I think you should join Lotor.”

Shiro had reached out to Keith, appearing to try and stop him from speaking those last words, but recoiled as they came.

Lance paused, sudden confusion wafting over him.“What?” he whispered, eyes moving to the others for answers. “What is he talking about?”

The group all looked at each other awkwardly, but returned to their stern selves as they faced the brunet again.

Allura sighed to herself and began, “Lotor has proven to be too dangerous wondering the castle unsupervised. While Jake is here he will be kept in his old holding cell.”

Lance's eyes widened. He looked for any signs that she was bluffing, yet her face remained firm and full of truth.

“You can't do that!”

“Oh yes we can, he's a bad guy. We can't trust him!” Pidge viscously jabbed her finger in his direction.

Allura nodded toward Pidge and cleared her throat. “It has already been decided. I'm sorry Lance.”

“No!” Lance's pitch rose, wracking with sudden fear. “Don't punish Lotor. It's not his fault! It's... it's my fault,” The brunet's eyes drifted downwards, his heart clenched, emotional torment set in.

There was a short pause among the paladins as if they were processing or unsure of what they had just heard.

“Come again?” Coran asked, twisting a finger in his left ear to better hear the paladin.

Lance took a breath and forced his words out. “I told him Jake attacked me. Lotor was being protective, so... don't blame him.”

Silence returned. Lance could almost feel the room heat up as his friend's blood boiled around him.

“Are you kidding me? Jake almost died because of you!”

Lance's attention ripped from the floor in front of him and toward Pidge. The girl was practically seething. Hunk was with her.

“Wait, so everything Lotor said was true? Why? Why would you say those things?!” he exclaimed.

Lance winced and retaliated. “Because it's true! Listen, everything I told Lotor is true. Jake isn't the amazing guy he makes out to be! I was never safe with him!”

“I think the relationship you're in right now isn't all that safe,” Keith commented sharply.

“Don't you dare compare Lotor to him!”

“Why? Look, I'm sorry to say this Lance but frankly what you had with Jake seemed more healthy,” Pidge growled.

“There was nothing healthy about it!”

“ **Enough!** ” Allura suddenly shouted, leaving the paladins around her silent. The princess took a breath to compose herself, her eyes narrowing in Lance's direction. “Lotor is being locked away for the time being. And Lance, I think it is best the two of you don't see each other while he is confined.”

Lance's heart dropped. He opened his mouth to retaliate but stopped himself, hesitantly closing it.

This... was his fault. If Lance had kept this to himself and hid his own pain better from Lotor none of this would have happened. He should have kept quiet. He shouldn't have let it come this far.

His friends would not listen to him. They wouldn't believe him...

“May I suggest an alternative?”

Lance's eyes which threatened to spill tears looked to Jake as he came forward. The blond's expression was soft and kind and filled with hope.

The group all nodded at Jake's question and he smiled them a 'thank you'.

“Listen, it's not safe here for Lance. I think, if it's alright with everyone, I should take him back to the rebellion with me. He needs time away from Lotor. He depends on him too much. And I think in time I can break the wall between us and we can be friends.”

Lance's eyes widened at him, then opened further as he heard Allura's reply.

“Well, Lance has been distant lately and I do agree with you that he needs to be separated from Lotor. However Lance is needed here to help form Voltron, but we may be able to work around it for the time being.”

Jake beamed at the princess, before turning back to Lance's horror stricken face. “What do you say, Lance?”

A loud slap echoed in the room. Jake stumbled back, hand clasping his cheek in shock. Keith and Hunk immediately left their posts to hold Lance back as he attempted to give the blond another hit.

“ **I HATE YOU! I HATE YOU! I HATE YOU!!!** ” Lance shrieked and writhed in his friend's holds as they held onto each arm.

“I was just trying to help...” Jake moped and rubbed his cheek.

“Lance, stop it!” Shiro shouted, his voice was however drowned out by Lance's own.

“Why didn't you stay away? Why couldn't you just leave me alone!? Gah! Get off of me!” Lance twisted his body and managed to wretch one arm free. He threw himself forward, now free from his jacket and leaving Keith and Hunk holding the limp clothing by the sleeves.

He staggered forward, catching himself before he fell. Lance looked up to his opponent, this time he didn't cower at the blond's hard stare as he prepared to throw himself at him again.

“Enough! Lance I have had enough of your insolent–– !” Allura halted mid sentence, speech instead replaced with a soft gasp.

Lance whipped his head toward her, both confusion and anger simmered inside him as he saw her shocked expression. She wasn't the only one.

All around the room he could see everyone pale. Jake's expression turned to realisation. Lotor's looked stricken.

Behind Lance, he could hear Hunk and Keith shuffle back in what he assumed was the same shred of incredulity as the others.

He narrowed his eyes, “What?”

Silence.

Lance threw his arms up in exasperation, “What?!” he demanded, before halting as he caught what they were staring at. The brunet's fine fashion choice was showing. His sleeves were rolled up to his elbows and beheld to everyone the mark his jacket had been hiding.

The paladin's world crashed down on him like a slab of bricks. Staring back at him were the dark imprinted fingers. His bruise.

“Where did those come from?”

Lance looked up from his arm and saw Shiro take a step forward. He was no longer frustrated with the brunet and appeared more disturbed by the sight of him.

Lance's face reddened. He pulled down his sleeves in a frenzy. Some part of him thought that if he were covered he would somehow be safe from their judging stares.

“Did... did someone bite you?” Coran asked.

Lance gasped and slapped a hand over his shoulder, the Altean man having reminded him his shirt collar was too loose to cover that particular spot.

“It's nothing,” he promptly insisted.

Jake looked more scared than Lance. He gazed around anxiously at everyone, then directed attention toward himself. He stepped forward and motioned Lance to come to closer. “Lance, we should go,” he spoke urgently. “Come on, grab your things.”

“Hold on a second,” Pidge countered, leaning her head forward and squinting. “What are those?”

“Lance is confused right now. We should give him space–”

“ **No** ,” Shiro retorted, firing a sharp gaze at the blond. Jake risked a response, but the expression the black paladin was giving him made him realise it was futile.

“We'll hear it from him,” Shiro continued and turned back to Lance, expression softening, but still hard with intent. “What happened?”

“I....”

“You don't have to answer that!”

“You have no say here!” Shiro snapped again. It was evident now that he was growing suspicious of the blond's crass behaviour.

Jake's chest began to heave, looking around in sudden fear. As if his mind presented him with a saving grace his face suddenly lit up. He whirled back to Lance, voice dripping with worry. “Lotor did this, didn't he? Tell them, I know he did!”

“No...”

Lance's tense posture lowered as he heard Hunk behind him. He looked to his friend, seeing his horror filled expression as he shook his head. “Those are too small to be Lotor's...”

“Lance, what happened?” Shiro continued to prod for an answer.

Lance's gaze moved from person to person. He'd lost his voice the moment he'd been revealed. He felt like running. He felt like crying. He could do neither as they all simply stared at him.

“Tell us what happened!” Keith suddenly barked, causing the brunet to flinch.

“What do you think happened?!” Lance retorted. He couldn't control the quivering in his legs. He was exposed. “What the fuck did I just tell you, huh?! Don't want to believe your precious idol can do this? Because let me tell you, he can do so much worse. He always did. Why do you think I didn't want him here?!”

“Lance what...” Allura began, but hesitated. Her face contorted to anger and she rounded on Jake, her voice suddenly harsh. “What _exactly_ happened last night?”

Jake's skin grew chalky white. He looked between Pidge and Hunk, hoping they would come to aide him. He was only met with perplexed leers. With no one to help him, Jake bit his lip nervously and stammered, “N-nothing princess. I told you all everything that happened already.”

“And was it the truth?” Allura hissed.

Jake was cornered and had no control over the situation. “Are you all?.... no.. no I would never hurt Lance if that's what you're thinking! You've got me all wrong. Lance, Lance tell them,” the blond pleaded.

Lance took a step back and shook his head at him.

Jake's head lowered close to his shoulders. He was the one who was trapped.

“I love him! I love Lance! I'd never– !” his gaze was set back on Lance and his eyes widened suddenly as if him being there was a surprise to him.

Jake marched forward. Lance stepped back as he came for him.

“Lance, I love you! I've always loved you! I wasn't raping you. I was just cleansing you of that monster.”

It was the worst thing he could have owned up to. All around the room everyone bared a horror stricken face. Lance only trembled more, his vision now blurred with tears and he held himself close. There was no hiding it now...

“Jake...oh my god...” Hunk said in disbelief, slowly moving his head side to side.

In that second the sound of metal forcibly tearing ripped through the air, followed by a heavy thud against the floor.

It happened too fast for him to follow. A white blur moved in Lance's vision, there was a scream and suddenly Jake was pulled from his sight.

Lotor, having torn the handcuffs off of himself, stood tall. He lifted the blond to meet with his dark gaze. Jake's writhed and heaved, all air having been cut off by the hand around his throat. It only squeezed harder the more he struggled.

Lance swayed a little as he turned and waved his arms in alarm, “Stop! Put him down!”

Lotor looked over his shoulder at him, “ **Why?** ” he demanded “He doesn't deserve to live.”

Lotor was not bluffing, if Jake's wheezing was any indication. His mouth opened and closed like a fish out of water. His pupils shrunken to pinheads and his face growing more red by each passing second.

Lotor intended on killing Jake. They all realised that if he wanted to, he could snap his neck at any moment. Lance it seemed had put restraint on this action however.

“Lotor, please consider– ” Allura's words were cut short by Lance's own.

“He's not worth it. H-he didn't even get that far! You don't have to do this!” Lance interjected, voice choked with despair. “Please just.... just stop.”

There was a long pause.

Whether it were for the tears or if he actually considered the words a look of defeat washed over Lotor. With a grunt, he unceremoniously threw Jake to the ground, the blond releasing a pained cry.

Everyone stood in stunned silence, trying to process all that had just transpired before them.

Hunk moved to comfort Lance, reaching a hand out tentatively.

“Lance––”

“Stop!” Lance slapped his hand away as it made contact with his shoulder, startling both Hunk and the rest of the group. “Why do you even care!? You sided with him! You defended him! You... you...” his shoulders lowered, his breath hitched.

The notion was all the more painful as he remembered all that they had been through together. The times they fought along side each other, the hardships they endured together, the trust... They didn't trust him enough to listen to him.

“...I thought you were on my side...”

“We are on your side–– ”

“Bullshit Keith!” Lance snapped, then faced everyone. “You tried to separate us... me and Lotor... and you were going to send me away. You were going to give me to _him!_ You don't care about me... you don't...”

Lance shook his head. He turned on his heel and ran for the door.

“Lance wait!” Hunk called, yet the brunet went without pause, exiting the room.

Lotor gave the group an incredulous glare before setting off after his partner, leaving all still present to dwell in their cloud of repent.

“How... could we not see...” Allura placed a hand over her forehead, her expression grave. The princess blinked once, then composed herself with an intake of air. She, along with the rest of the paladins turned their attention back on their offender.

Jake rubbed his throat and looked up from the floor. He flinched when he noticed the glares that surrounded him. An unwelcome smile forced its way onto his face and he raised his hands defensively, “Now, now. I was just kidding... you know me, I'm....”

Allura prepared to shout profanities, before pausing as Hunk began to approach the blond.

Jake scooted back on the floor, but managed to grin as he stopped in front of him.

“H-h-hey Hunk... buddy?”

Jake was silenced by the yellow paladin's fist.

 

\-----------------------------------------------

 

 

The room was still, an improvement to the previous wailing the prince had tried to put a stop to. Lotor was equipped with many things. His skills surpassed many Galra, even in his youth he was a force the empire wasn't yet prepared for. Impressing both ally and enemy.

Tenderness did not come with his skills. The need to help someone was foreign to the prince. While he and his generals helped aide each other in dark times, he had barely any knowledge of how to properly give comfort. He understood that with stress it was best to keep a distance and let them calm themselves. It was different however when the person was pleading for some type of relief he didn't know how to give.

Lance was asleep now. He laid on his side, facing the wall and appearing to curl in on himself. With all that had happened within only a few days his feeling of vulnerability was not unexpected.

Lotor occasionally turned his head when the brunet would huff, or make many movement while he slept. The prince was in the process of calming himself down as he sat at the edge of the mattress, staring out into oblivion.

Lotor was disgusted with how everyone reacted. While he knew it would be difficult for them to believe Lance he expected them to at least consider the possibility that it were the truth.

Despite having all night to think of this, Lotor couldn't let the thought pass.

The amount of value they had for Jake was more than he had anticipated. He knew that because of the team going against Lance that the brunet was internally struggling. They had shunned him away.

He had after all spent nearly the whole night ranting about it.

From what Lance had told him he technically hadn't been raped. But it was close enough that Lotor regretted not killing the blond when he had him. Lance wept for most of the night, even with the amount of exhaustion he held, his emotions made it difficult to doze off. Spooning the paladin had settled him enough to allow him to drift.

It was morning now and nearing the time the other paladins would emerge from their rooms. Lotor wondered what this day would have in store. He doubted Lance would want to face anyone after what happened last night. But he couldn't stay in here for long.

A knock against the door drew Lotor's attention. He turned his gaze toward it, before shifting it back to his partner as the mattress moved under him. Lance visibly stirred at the interruption, yet remained in his haze.

The knock turned into several more as whoever was at the door became bolder. “Lance?”

Lotor's face set into a scowl as he detected who was outside. Of course it was Shiro. He seemed to be the only reasonable person in the castle. Sending his partner's idol was the easiest way to force forgiveness.

“Lance, please come out. We need to talk. Are you alright?”

Lotor watched the door in silence. Lance's form remained still.

“Lance, I know you're hurting. But you need to let us help you.”

Lotor rose from his spot and stalked towards the barrier separating him from the black paladin.

“Lance–– ”

The door slid open so that the two could be face to face. Lotor produced a sharp glare when his eyes met with the black paladin's. Shiro looked surprised, seemingly not expecting Lotor to be the one to answer.

“What?” was all he said, his voice verging to that of a hiss.

Shiro's surprised status faltered to one of guilt. “Lotor, I think I speak for everyone when I say we couldn't have been more wrong about you. You were only trying to protect him, we understand that now. We're sorry for everything.”

“Good,” Lotor responded, pressing the door to close.  
Shiro was quick to catch the door before it fully shut and with some force pushed it back open. “Wait, we need to talk. Is Lance in there?” he asked, attempting to see passed the larger.

Lotor moved to block his vision, “He's resting. He hasn't been able to sleep ever since that parasite came here.”

Shiro deflated at the information, but he remained calm. “Let us talk to him. He needs to know that we're here for him.”

“Like you were last night?”

“Lotor–– ”

“Absolutely not.”

There was a heavy silence between them as they stared at each other. Shiro inhaled slowly, his eyes never leaving Lotor's as he spoke.

“Lotor, I don't want to fight you. I'm not going to force myself in, but I want Lance to come out. Everyone's waiting for him.”  
Lotor straightened up to his full height, staring the black paladin down. “So you've devised a group meeting? I don't think he would like to be bombarded with questions at this moment.”

“We're not going to bombard him with questions. We just want to make sense of everything. Jake wouldn't talk, so the only one who has any answers is Lance. We also want to make sure he's okay and if there's anything we can do to help or... at least make up for everything.” A light blush came to the black paladin's face as said those last words, remembering clearly how they had treated the brunet.

“Well, if you would like to redeem yourselves then I would suggest–– !”

“Lotor, what are you doing?” a groggy voice mumbled from inside the room. Lance came up beside the prince, having been roused from sleep and was in the process of rubbing eyes. He gave Lotor a questioning look, before his gaze met with Shiro's. Lance froze, eyes fixed on his leader.

“Good morning?” Shiro said awkwardly. When met with no reply, he continued. “Jake was sent back to the rebellion last night, you don't have to stay in your room any more.”

Lance narrowed his eyes at him, making him realise this wasn't going to be easy.

Shiro took a breath, and lifted the article of clothing he had been holding. “Here,” he said, handing Lance his jacket.

The brunet eyed it as if it was his first time seeing it, then slowly took it from Shiro.  
“What do you want?” Lance sighed, indignant.

Shiro frowned at his tone, but continued. “We need to talk.”

“Yeah? Well, maybe I don't want to,” came Lance's bitter response.

“Lance, you know we have to talk about this eventually,” Shiro offered, “Listen, I understand. You're hurt, you don't want to see anyone right now. But please at least consider it.”

“You couldn't understand,” Lance muttered, seeming to have only picked up that one line.

“Then help us understand,” Shiro urged. “Don't you want this to stop? You can't possibly want to hide forever. We can help you get through this and talking about it is a good start. We'll listen, even if we don't like what we hear. But we want to give you a chance to explain everything. So please come out?”

Lance took a moment to consider his words. He was still furious with all of them, but he if there were anything he could find to help dull his pain he would take it. Lance looked up to see what Lotor thought of it. The prince in turn gave him a look that said, “I don't think it's wise, but I won't stop you if you go with him.”

Lance sighed and turned back to Shiro, “Fine, I'll come out,” he begrudgingly said, stepping out of the comfort of his room.

“Thank you.”

“Whatever...” Lance murmured. He slid on his jacket before he left. Hoping to cover the shame that had branded itself on him.

He began to slowly follow Shiro down the hall, Lotor being close beside him and matching his pace. Shiro kept a reasonable distance, but slowed his own steps to ensure they kept up.

They walked in silence. Each step they got closer to the sitting room the more Lance's feet began to drag. He thought about ditching his previous agreement to reveal everything to his team, but as he caught sight of the door his plan of running was pointless.

The door opened as they arrived. Shiro took one more look over his shoulder at them, then stepped into the room.

There was the rest of the team, all in amongst the octagonal shaped seating area and watching the brunet with looks of doubt. Lance's head felt too heavy to hold up and it remained narrowed in his time venturing for his own seat opposite from them. He folded his arms tightly against his chest, not daring to meet with his friend's eyes.

Lotor didn't take a seat like the others and instead chose to stand by the brunet, regarding each paladin individually with resentment.

Allura stood in the centre. As expected, she was the regent for this discussion, the one who was to ask the questions and keep anything from getting out hand.

She frowned when she saw Lance preferring to sit opposite from his friends instead of near. She took a small step closer and cleared her throat, “We would all like to apologise for our behaviour last– ”

“I don't care.”

Allura blinked, mildly surprised by Lance's sudden input, then frowned. “Lance, we are trying to apologise– ”

“Why don't you apologise to Lotor? You tried to lock him up and make _him_ the bad guy,” Lance further pressed.

Having been cut off a second time Allura narrowed her eyes at him. He was being difficult. Lance knew that, but he didn't care if he were upsetting any of them because of it. They had pushed him this far after all.

Allura sighed and considered Lance's words, turning to face Lotor. “Of course, please accept our highest apologies for our mistreatment. We were wrong to attempt imprisonment.”

Lotor merely gave her a sour look.

The princess moved her attention back onto Lance. Seeing that he was still not pleased, she went on with other matters. “We interrogated Jake late last night, apparently the device he had was a simple coding pad he managed to disguise. Lotor was right about that as well,” she grimaced.

Allura was clearly uncomfortable giving credit to Lotor's sharp skills, especially when it involved him proving her wrong on something.

“Seriously?...” Lance hissed, reaching up to ball his hand in his hair.

“Jake would have heard you were apart of Voltron and devised this plan. We also viewed the footage of the previous night and witnessed Jake attempt to abduct you. He would have succeeded if he hadn't been... distracted,” Allura's face darkened and she swallowed hard.

Lance's eyes bulged, then stared back at the floor harder than before.

“You don't have anything to be ashamed of. If anyone should feel that way I'd say he has been long overdue,” Coran added, noticing the embarrassment on the brunet's face.

“Did he... did he really?...” Pidge stammered.

“No,” Lance said with a shake of his head, not taking his eyes off of the floor.  
“Then what happened?” Keith encouraged, resulting in Lance's irritated groan.

“I woke up and he was on top of me, okay?” he retorted. It was evident that this was a painful to talk about. They thankfully didn't push him further with it.

“You won't be seeing him again. He was sent back to the rebellion last night with– ”

“I know,” Lance cut Coran off.

The group took a moment to see if the brunet would continue or possibly reveal some vital information they sought to gather. Yet he only sat in stony silence, anger simmering underneath.

“Do any of them know?” Lance asked suddenly, making them focus on him again. “Do any of the rebels know about... that,” he didn't look at them when he asked, resorting in staring at the far wall instead.

“I told Matt,” Pidge admitted, then flinched as Lance turned to look at her. “I had to. Somebody in the rebellion has to know. And he wanted to know why he had to drop everything he was doing and come collect Jake. He deserved to know who Jake was or at the very least why he was covered in bruises.”

“Bruises?” Lance raised a brow.

Shiro coughed a bit and awkwardly explained, “Hunk beat him until he passed out,” he admitted, causing the yellow paladin to grow red with embarrassment.

A snicker tugged at Lance's lips at the information and a portion of himself wished he had stayed long enough to see the fight. “That's awesome...”

His comment made smiles come to the paladin's faces. It was the first time during this whole endeavour that they had seen Lance happy about something. It left after a moment and the group found themselves in another silence.

“We can't begin to tell you how sorry we are... for everything. The way we treated you was... just terrible,” Shiro solemnly stated.

Lance looked in his direction for a short moment, but said nothing.

As the stillness became more unbearable Hunk saved the group from uneasiness and spoke up.

“We do care about you, we just... we didn't know. Jake was our friend. We never would have thought that he'd actually do something like this. He seemed like a great guy. But we saw what we wanted to see.” His head drooped.

Lance exhaled and shook his head slowly, “No, I know you do... I... don't know why I said that before... I was just...” his teeth clenched and he looked up in sudden outrage, “I was over it. All of this. I finally found my way. Started doing something useful with myself until he shows up dazzling everyone and suddenly you're all smitten with him. He never had to work for anything, he never had to bend over backwards for anybody, he was just... him! The perfect guy with his perfect attitude, perfect looks, perfect everything! And I was the one thing in his life that wasn't perfect,” he spat. “And he had to change that.”

“So he hurt you?” Shiro whispered.

“Oh wow, now you get it,” Lance snorted.

“Lance, we understand– ”

“No you don't understand! Did you ever lie to your own parents about all the cuts on you, or how you broke your arm? Or why you got so scared every time you missed a call. Did you have someone that was meant to care about you beat you up, spread rumours about you to make everybody avoid you and you _hate_ yourself because you thought it was the other way around... that you were in the wrong and you were the one making the mistakes... that you deserved it and you were pathetic because... you let him do it...” his speech faltered as he tried to steady himself. He fought with himself not to cry, he'd done too much of that already. He wasn't some snivelling victim hoping to be rescued. And yet, deep down he knew he was...

Lotor rested his hand on his shoulder, causing the brunet to flinch. Lance just then realising that he were trembling.

It was a comforting gesture and if his friend's expressions told him anything Lotor was glaring at them, no doubt blaming them for the brunet's suffering. He sniffed once, then raised his own hand to lay atop Lotor's.

“I trusted him too once...” he stated, speaking more in a mumble as his anger receded, “It felt like we were a perfect match. He showed up one day and he was just so different from everybody in town. He said we were soul mates and were supposed to meet each other. Can you believe I fell for that trash?... it was stupid...”

“How long has he been doing this?” Keith asked. He didn't need to be clear about what he meant, the graveness in his tone was all the brunet needed.

“A few months after we started dating. By then I was in love with him and wanted to make him happy,” Lance shut his eyes in a grimace, “So what if I got hurt? It was all done to toughen me up and make me a better person... at least that's what I used to think.”

He opened his eyes and met with his friend's concerned faces. “After a while I realised what was going on. I wanted to get out but I was too scared to say it to his face so...”

Lance removed his hand from Lotor's and sat it on his knee. Lotor pulled his own back as the brunet sighed and navigated his attention toward Hunk.

“Do you remember the train we took to get to the Garrison?”

The yellow paladin offered him a reassuring smile. “Sure I do. That's when we first met.”

“That was my first attempt to leave him.”

Hunk's smile immediately fell.  
“I just had to get out of there. My family knew something was wrong and they were worried about me. So... they helped sign me into the Garrison. But...” Lance glared at the floor, frustration rising in his chest. “Of course he knew where I was going! Heck, we talked about it! He knew how much I wanted to get in there, we used to watch stars together and wonder what was out there... that was corny... but fooled me huh?...”

“Did you ever try to talk to someone about it in the Garrison? Didn't anyone notice?” Shiro enquired, perturbed by the thought of faculty members being so close to the problem and yet not seeing anything.

Lance gave Shiro a strained look, “Yeah... Jennifer did.”

Pidge and Hunk twitched at the name and leaned in curiously.

Lance noticed this and smiled, “Jennifer's boyfriend didn't give me that black eye. Jake gets jealous. He always did,” he grumbled. “He dragged me away and accused me of cheating on him and not really loving him. I talked back to him and... well... you get the idea.”

Lance shook his head in disappointment. It felt so wrong admitting all of this. After so long of keeping it to himself he could barely believe the words coming out of his mouth. Almost accusing himself of lying.

“Jennifer followed us and saw what happened. I thought she was going to stop it or get somebody. But... she just walked away,” he glared bitterly as he remembered. He inhaled deeply and went on, “The other time Commander Iverson found us. The one time I was happy to see the grouch.”

There was a glint of hope in his friend's eyes, it was short lived as the brunet finished his retelling.

“He saw me cry and told me to toughen up and... that was it. That's when I realised I was alone in this.”

Lance's shoulders slumped and he found his gaze dropping yet again. He hated this. God did he hate this... He felt as though he were being put on trial. He didn't want to look up and see their judging faces. He didn't want them to feel sorry for him. He did have to admit, it felt good knowing how guilty they realised they were. He supposed that would be viewed as a bad thing to think, but in this moment he didn't care and preferred to enjoy the feeling while it lasted. At least he could feel something that wasn't misery.

“Oh Lance...” Allura began, but was instantly cut off.

“Stop it!” Lance demanded, the venom in his voice before made it's return, “I'm not some pity party. I'm Lance, the guy who doesn't let anything get to him! That's who I'm meant to be instead of some sob story!” he took a moment to catch his breath. He could see the hurt expressions his friend's were giving him. He recoiled, realisation finally setting in. They were only trying to comfort him and here he was shouting at them every chance he got just to dull his own pain. It was a terrible thing, one that Jake was accustomed to doing. “I'm so... pathetic...” he whispered.

“No, you're not,” Allura argued, her tone bordering on irritation and disbelief. “You are very brave, Lance. You defended both Lotor and yourself despite having everyone stand against you. You even stood up to Jake when he tried to advance on you. You are an essential part of Voltron. In fact, you're more than just a team mate. You are a good friend,” she announced.

“She's right.”

Lance turned his attention to Shiro.

“You may have been alone back then, but you're our friend. Even if he did kidnap you, we would have followed him in our loins. We're sorry for everything that's happened, but we promise that you'll never have to see Jake again. He's gone for good now.”

Lance ran his hand through his hair, an exasperated grunt humming in his throat, “Yeah, and now he's off making merry with everybody in the rebellion. But hey, at least Matt doesn't like him.”

“That's not true!” Pidge defensively interjected, sitting up in her seat. “He's going to pay for all of this. We're just waiting for you.”

Lance was caught off guard by what Pidge had said and he looked to Allura as she cleared her throat.

“We thought it was best if you decide what be done with him. It is the least we can do after all that has happened,” she offered her hand out.

“It's... my call?” he whispered. He furrowed his brows as they nodded, growing heavy hearted. He was given the choice? He could choose what fate that lie ahead of Jake? This was... strange. Jake had always inflicted punishment on Lance for the smallest mistakes. Never once did the brunet consider punishing him back. And yet he was given that power now.

Lance swallowed the lump in his throat and looked up sternly, “The rebellion takes prisoners, don't they?”  
Allura gave him a curious look, “They know many prisons that contain enemies, yes.”

“Put him there,” he muttered. “If he can get prison time on Earth for the things he's done, then that's how it's going to be here.”

Now Jake would know what it felt like to be trapped. He would repent all those times he laid a hand on the paladin. For his mind games and cruel behaviour. Jake would know what it was like.

The group all looked at each other. Allura frowned, then nodded, “Then we will have to make a call,” she announced.

The paladin's rose from their seats and prepared their walk to the bridge.

A pan of fear hit Lance as they began to file away, “Wait,” he extended his arm out, causing for the rest to pause. “So what now? Am I just going to pretend none of this happened?”

“No, of course not. You don't have to lie any more,” Shiro said as if it were obvious.

Lance found himself sinking in his seat as the black paladin continued, each word seemingly dicing away the wall he built around himself.

“It's going to be hard for you to recover from all of this, but we're going to be more open minded from now on. We'll do whatever it takes. We look out for each other and that means you too. We're here for you. You can be sure of that.”

Lance stared at them. The overcompensating nature was too much for the brunet and his eyes began to water.

“Dammit...” he grunted, embarrassed that he once again was crying in front of them.

“I got you buddy,” Hunk said, raising himself from his seat and making his way over to the sobbing paladin. Lance only cried harder as his closest friend wrapped him in a bear hug.

Pidge came next and sat up the opposite side and placed a hand on Lance's shoulder.

It was going to be a very hard recovery. But this was a good start. This was what he needed.  
Allura turned her head away from the scene and focused on Lotor. She raised a curious brow at him, “I suppose we will be seeing a more protective side of you from now on?”

“I would assume,” Lotor concurred with a haughty smile.

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> FIN!  
> Woohoo! I finished a fanfic! And yes, this is the definite end. I hope you enjoyed reading this, please let me know what you think and if you have any questions feel free to ask, I do love to chat. ;)


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